“I couldn’t stand it anymore: I turned round and spat in his mug. I remember how one animal stood behind me…”.
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They beat me with their batons and cracked me on the head. I vividly remember how I left the prison: I was led in handcuffs down a corridor lined with prison officers. “I was transferred to IK-28 in the end ( where Alyokhina also served time).
, whose job it was to make sure the law was observed in correctional facilities, forced me to dictate my confession. The main thing was to get out, to stay alive. I was by no means going to carry the can the whole way. “I understood then that I had to get out of that place so I decided to take the blame for the death of P – but only until the case reached. “I woke up one morning to find that P had been strangled and her body placed in the corner of the cell. I knew that the prisoners would kill her, I just didn’t know when. I asked that she be kept away from the room where prisoners are intimidated, tortured and broken by other inmates and prison staff. I went to and warned that the observers intended to kill her. “I didn’t usually get involved in disputes because it’s dangerous, but on this occasion I stood up for P after they set upon her in the shower. “A female prisoner, P, was killed soon after I arrived. They beat me up and placed me in solitary confinement. Once, I blurted out: ‘If you don’t let me appeal against my sentence, I’ll complain to about your crimes.’ I didn’t know then that was in league with them. Of course, I still didn’t understand this fully back then, I didn’t realise quite where I’d ended up. If you didn’t take responsibility for a crime you didn’t commit it would be only be the beginning of your troubles, the worst will be yet to come. “Sometimes they forced people to confess.
“From then on, my relationship with the staff started to go downhill: they gave me a good beating on several occasions and placed me in solitary confinement. I had been offered work in the prison administration but had turned it down and so ‘didn’t deserve’ the right to appeal my sentence, they said. You can write as much as you want, they said. But nothing came of it: the Federal Penitentiary Service didn’t send my appeals on. I couldn’t write the appeals alone but the women in my cell helped me. “I started to try to contest my sentence. Photograph: Ilya Shablinsky/AFP/Getty Images Pussy Riot member Nadya Tolokonnikova in solitary confinement in prison. I didn’t know then that there is only one law in prison: everyone does as they want. “From the detention centre, I was sent on to prison in the city of Perm. But they brought a case against me and fitted me up. According to them I was an alcoholic and a drug addict, despite the fact that I had played sport since I was a kid and competed at local and regional levels. “In court, they painted a very negative picture of me. My sister was going to throw it away in the morning but the plan didn’t work out and I was caught with it all. I went back to the flat and grabbed the first thing I saw, a sheepskin coat and something else, even though there were more valuable things there. Should I go to the police or what? I was told to make it look as if he was killed during a robbery. “I went to my sister’s place to sort it all out. He grabbed hold of a knife but I turned it against him and killed him.
Only now, after having spent so many years inside, do I understand why prisoners are so quick to reach for their weapons. “While we talked about this and that, his hands started to creep towards me again. “Since I looked like a tomboy, he had tried it on with me many times and he was used to getting whatever he wanted by force. He liked boys but what does it matter who likes what? This guy had committed crimes but he had served his time by then. “On 8 March 1999 I went to meet someone I knew.
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